Happy Saturday my loves, guess who’s back from the depths of the earth after a long long long period of silence! Today, I want to talk about exactly that, something I have been struggling with for some time now. I very much believe in the power of transparency and vulnerability. I hope that sharing my journey with mental illness will inspire others to do the same, and through opening up to one another we can spark conversation and crush the stigma that divides us all.
At the end of the day, none of us are perfect obviously, and we can’t always be happy, joyful or present all the time. We are all struggling with something. When I decided to start a blog, my aim was to connect with and reach an audience, and hopefully inspire people along the way as well. As my blog has grown throughout the past few years, I have found a sense of community, where you can discover that other people are going through the same things that you might be going through, and that you are never alone.
Today, I want to talk about my struggle with depression. Struggling with depression has been incredibly tough and has knocked me down more heavily than I would like to admit. Having grown up in a belief system that mental illnesses are something you just need to “Get over”, I have had to sit down with myself and accept that yes, this struggle is part of my journey, and yes, this is something that I am not ashamed of despite the stigma around it. For all the times when I’ve been told, “Why are you depressed you have so much to be thankful for” or “Why are you always so negative all the time” or “Just calm down and relax and everything will be fine”. For all the times I have felt guilty about being depressed because yes, I do have many many things to be grateful for, but yet I still questioned why I felt that heavy feeling of sadness and dread over my shoulders. It’s important that we educate ourselves on how to approach and have conversations about and with people who are suffering from mental illnesses.
Through my struggle with depression, I have learnt to hold myself, and to comfort myself through the pain. I have learnt to lean on others and be okay with it, I have learnt that getting help when necessary is nothing to be ashamed of, and trusting that I will always find a way to get through it. I have learnt that my depression does not and will never define me, that I am a whole person outside of my trauma and obstacles that I face. I have learnt that yes, it’s completely okay to take some time off from the mediums through which I choose to express myself to the world, such as social media, and even my blog.
Taking time off to take care of yourself is necessary, because as human beings we are constantly giving off our energy into our careers, relationships and friendships. I am lucky enough to have people who support me and push me to be the best version of myself, despite seeing the “not so good” sides.
Life is cyclic, there are days when it’s incredibly hard to get up in the morning, and it’s not because of lack of sleep. There are other days when I can’t wait to see another day and experience the world for all it’s splendour. It’s important that despite everything, we embrace ourselves for who we truly are, in our entirety and not see ourselves as a reflection of our struggles. After all, we are only human, and we are doing our best at it.